Vampire Babes & Pumpkin Ass

Below, I'll drop down some Halloween related images.

Actually, I intended for this post to be loaded with sexy Vampires, but after doing a quick image search on the good ol' world wide web for Vampire Whores, Vampire Sluts, and Vampire Babes, I mostly found a bunch of crap. I did manage to find a couple art pics that looked pretty hot, and an unusual image of some individual who decided to turn their ass into Halloween artwork (a big pumpkin butt). Check them out below......




...Happy Halloween!

Additional Resource Link: "Sexy Babes & Exotic Models" [link is no longer active]

Sexy Image Gallery featuring a heart-shaped ass:  Alexis Texas - Porn Star Sensation [link is no longer active]

---End of Post "Vampire Babes & Pumpkin Ass"

Holy Hamburger Hell!

I've recently run across, well, what I thought at the time, a massive 15 lb. burger that was beyond my comprehension to understand an answer for this very simple question, "why so fucking big?" Anyway, I got to noticing that the web page (http://money.cnn.com/2005/05/03/pf/biggest_burger/) that was speaking about this 15 lb. beefy monster of a sandwich, was dated way back in 2005. I thought, "yep, who knows how big they make 'em now."

Well, "Holy Hamburger Hell," I found a promotion for a (possibly the world's largest cheeseburger currently known to man) 123 lb. burger within minutes of my prior search!
You can find it here: http://www.seriouseats.com/2007/02/worlds-largest-burger.html [Link is no longer active]

Holy cow-killing Cro-Magnon man! I enjoy devouring a big, tasty burger with French fries and the works, but damn! What in the hell do you eat this 123 lb. hamburger with, uh, a hatchet, axe, and a freshly sharpened machete? Ha-ha!

If you want to peruse the contents of the main "big burger" site (Denny's Beer Barrel Pub) that has many eating challenges along with freakish-sized burgers, visit: http://www.dennysbeerbarrelpub.com/
Please be advised (if you're feeling queasy), if you browse through Denny's website, you may run across some graphic images of utter glut! LOL!

I hear that Denny's Beer Barrel Pub also has some pretty damn good tasting regular-sized burgers along with a wide selection of beer "to go," so if you're near the area and are craving some burger bliss or are just thirsty for some good ol' beer, you may want to give this place a whirl.

I think I'll just take the beer for now, and after seeing all of this mass consumption of beef patties, I may stay on a liquid diet for the rest of the day. Cheers! Ha-ha!

---End of Post "Holy Hamburger Hell!"

Fluffy America - Too Fat to Fight!

Welcome, folks! You've just entered into the kingdom of Fluffy America!!! 

Holy screaming torpedo shit, I just read an article that was aimed right at this softened country, and it is totally fucking pathetic; sad but true... 

The first part of the article starts off with: 

"Army Fitness: Unfit Recruits "Too Fat to Fight" Force Army to Ease Training: (CBS) "Army Strong" may be the recruiting slogan, but these days the U.S. Army seems less focused on new recruits' strength than on their excess weight. In fact, the Army has just rejiggered its basic physical training program, making allowances for recruits who are fat and out of shape when they show up for basic training. Sit-ups and long runs are out, reports the New York Times. In their place are exercises that look a lot like yoga and pilates." Read more: http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504763_162-20015281-10391704.html [Link is no longer active]

Okay, this has actually been going on for years, so no surprise here. In fact, I remember reading a headline "Americans too fat to fight," several years ago in a local newspaper. That is not the entire point; one of the more disturbing points is that we are now catering to these fluffy, pantywaist pansies by easing their training. What the fuck!? For one, we must obviously be desperate for recruits. If you follow the link I provided above and read that short article, you'll also run across how it states that most of them can't do push-ups, pull-ups, and sit-ups. Ha-ha! It also mentions how even the ones who are not overweight, are typically a lot weaker or softer than prior generations. Yeah, uh, no shit! Most of these candy-coated, sissy-ass weaklings sit around all day eating junk food and playing with their stupid cell phones or video games, etc. So what do you expect? Damn, where are the Homo sapiens headed? Perhaps into the land of Jiggling Jello via Tulip Heaven? Hence forth the Jello-man concept, below...

Lazy, proud, fluffy, and too fat to fight; go figure...

---End of Post

Blogger Be Wary...

I recently stumbled across an article that would make most bloggers who were critics, creative ranters, and whatnot, feel the need to be wary...

The article was titled "Bloggers Beware: Postings can lead to Lawsuits..." 

It went on saying: "A false sense of Internet security can mean legal quagmires for critics who are careless about facts. The Internet has allowed tens of millions of Americans to be published writers. But it also has led to a surge in lawsuits from those who say they were hurt, defamed or threatened by what they read, according to groups that track media lawsuits." Read More: http://articles.latimes.com/2010/aug/23/nation/la-na-blogger-suits-20100823 [Link is no longer active] 

When I first read it, I was like "Holy shit! What does this mean? Now you can't even say what you want to on your own blog without possibly violating some poor innocent individual's rights?" 

Well, not exactly, but it is possible under the right circumstances. You'd think most people could distinguish an opinion from a fact, but then again, I have no idea what some of these people get their self into. This is just sad, in all aspects of the term, but oh well... This is the direction that the majority evidently wants to go, into the land of a complex law book where if you sneeze wrong you could "offend" someone's code of existence. Do they write stupid how-to articles for that, too? Ha! Anyway...

Well, I must say, after reading that 2 page article, it seems like it more or less boils down to you're risking lawsuits by posting or commenting on blogs/websites using defamatory remarks and libelous slander - especially if you insult the wrong person. For the most part, even hate sites full of critics should be fairly safe by what I read. You get into trouble, though, when you start posting opinions as facts or make death-related threats or insults that could harm someone's, uh, whatever. 

However, if things get too strict when it comes to blogging or online comments, it looks like they would need to have millions of bloggers thrown in the slammer, since there is so many debatable subjects online that lead to arguments and name calling. It doesn't appear that exchanging petty insults on forums or comment fields are at risk, in general, but even that could change as time marches on. The bottom line, blogger be wary...

---End of Post

Put the cell phone down while driving!

I get so sick & tired of seeing people on the road who can't even drive a vehicle properly - and what makes it worse, is when these same folks (or even the ones who can halfway drive decent) constantly use a cell phone while doing so! Besides, it is dangerous to the other road inhabitants, not just your cell-phone-loving self!

Side Note: I do often try to be an imbecilic repellent due to the surrounding ignorance but, evidently, I must also be a cell phone repellent as well, since I'm one of the few who still refuses to own one! 

Anyway, I just received one of those "FW:" (forwarded) e-mails, ya know, the ones that want you to pass it on to every breathing being that has an e-mail account... Well, ever so often, you'll get one that is actually worth passing on. This one just happened to be about a fatal, tragic accident involving a motorcycle and a VW (Volkswagen) car.

The driver of the car was talking on a cell phone (unfortunately it was her last phone call) while pulling out from a side street, unaware of a motorcycle travelling at 85 m.p.h. Albeit the motorcycle was obviously going too fast, as they are dangerous enough as it is, but the driver using a cell phone did not help matters. The motorcyclist didn't have time to react to the driver pulling out right in front of him, and CRASH! It instantly killed the 2 people in the car and the cyclist! I'm not going to copy the e-mail word for word, but that is basically the message it was trying to get across. ...But the main message was the photo that was included with it. Well, it had several photos, but I'll just upload one of 'em, since I think anyone with a half-functioning brain will be able to get the point. The last part of that e-mail said: "This graphic demonstration was placed at the Motorcycle Fair by the Police and Road Safety Department. Pass this on to car drivers or soon to be new drivers, or new motorcycle owners AND ESPECIALLY EVERYONE YOU KNOW WHO HAS A CELL PHONE!!!!! A picture is worth a thousand words. Save a life. Stop talking on cell phones and texting while trying to drive. The life you save may be your own...or mine......" The horrible image is shown below:

Update: This post is 11 years old now (from the time of this update) and I must say, it hasn't really got any better. The phones are way more advanced now, etc., which means even more people are playing with their hand-held computer and whatnot. I still hear about accidents all the time on the road from what they now call "distracted driving." A few years after this post, I did eventually get a cell phone (mainly because I switched my home phone to a mobile from moving around a bit), but I refuse to ever use it while driving. For one, I'm just too busy looking out for idiotic drivers, but I still wouldn't distract myself with a phone while driving, even if I was on a lonely backroad somewhere. ---End of Update

Related Blog Link: "Driving Advice - Merge Left Means..."

---End of Post "Put the Cell Phone down while Driving!

Fuck the Dryer!

Yeah, such an odd title for a blog post. Ha! By the way, it doesn't in any way involve inserting yourself into the dryer. This post just narrates a brief time in my life were I was so pissed off about the dryer. After I finally got over this issue (a few months later), I did resort to buying and using a functioning dryer again, but anyway, it went something like this...

I've recently decided to say "fuck the dryer" for several reasons. For one, my girlfriend seems to be unable to remember to change the damn lint filter. The ramification of this equals the overheating of the dryer itself, which often leads to other problems, such as blowing the thermal cut-off sensor (whatever that thing is called), for example. So, out of disgust, after fixing it for the second time this year, only to have her screw it up yet again, I threw the lint filter out of the damn thing, as it ever-so gracefully bounced off the wall. 

Well, after several uses using the (non-heated) Air Fluff function (which sucks and doesn't work worth a fuck, by the way), the dryer is now full of lint near the heating element. So, now, even if I do fix the fuckin' thing again, it will surely catch on fire with all the lint near the actual heat source. ...But I didn't realize this until after I came back from the hardware store the other day. Sure, I can take the heating element casing off and probably vacuum around it, but the ancient piece of shit has borderline-stripped-nuts on it and I didn't have the right tools for the job, so to hell with it! 

Anyway, as I was saying, I headed to the appliance/parts store (before realizing I was already fucked). The guy there, the same one I seen a few months ago for this exact same problem, wanted me to also change out the other sensor thing or whatever you call it, since it comes in a pack of two. I told the persistent bastard that when I fixed it last time, I just replaced the part that I needed and that the other one wasn't compatible, ya know, that other sensor thing that was included in this asinine "pack of two." After he went on and on telling me how it should work, blah-blah, I finally said "okay!" Well, after I replaced the part that I knew was faulty, I went ahead and made the mistake and took this professional guy's advice and changed out the other thermal cut-off thingy, below it, even though it looked different than the original part like I already tried to tell him. 

Okay, I hooked it up, cut in on, and POOF! I'm now in complete darkness since I set all the breakers off in the house while nearly frying my own ass! I'm lucky the fucker didn't explode, by the sound it made. Now, both of those sensor thingy-ma-jiggies are blown and also, in addition to this horse shit, I'm also really tired of buying these metallic pieces of crap! By this time, I've really had enough of this Dryer bull-shit and I'm already leaning towards a more primitive approach. So after a few brief thoughts, I shouted "Fuck the Dryer," and I bought some stuff to install an indoor clothesline, instead. 

Hey, back in the day, people used to not even have a damn expensive Dryer. Besides, by using an indoor clothesline, the garments should last longer and it will save on my electric bill, so suck on that Uncle Sam! I'm starting to think that all of this aggravation may have ended up saving me money after all. Then again, maybe I'm just being a stubborn asshole, but either way, my live-in girlfriend better get used to those fucking clothespins for now! Ha-ha! 

Humorous Dryer Link: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Dryer [Link is no longer valid]---End of Post "Fuck the Dryer!"