This is one preposterous invention, in my eyes. I've never understood the insane reason to own a "leaf blower." WTF does it do? The absurd "function" of this silly device is to blow and/or propel air via electricity or by way of a fueled two-stroke engine, which produces the power to funnel air through a nozzle. Wow! I'm really impressed by this stupid, asinine invention!
I had an interview with a Leaf Blower that could talk, so I asked it a few questions:
Q: Okay, let me get this straight: A 'leaf blower' blows the leaves out of a person's path, yard or garden?
A: Yes, I'm Mr. Blower. I help rid your lawn of those pesky little leaves.
Q: If leaves are such a problem, what ever happened to using a simple rake?
A: Nonsense. How quaint, a rake? The risk of performing such raking-type movements might injure these delicate human beings. I'm the Leaf Blower, and I'm your friend.
Q: Dear, blower...you are very unusual, odd, queer, etc. What the fuck is wrong with leaves? I mean, they are natural...sort of like Mother Nature's debris and besides, they make for great fertilize.
A: Shut up! You ask too many questions.
Q: But really, what are you good for? All you do is blow stuff around; it doesn't really change anything. The next gust of wind and the leaves are right back.
A: You're blowing my cover! I'm just here for monetary reasons; damn it, shut the hell up!
Q: So, you admit to being a gusty, typhoon of whirling bullshit that only pollutes the planet every time your engine is fueled...whether it be by electricity or actual fuel/oil mixtures?
A: Blow me!
---End of Interview with the animated, imaginary "Leaf Blower"
See, I was right. The leaf blower blows due to its ability to suck in so much money from suckers to keep its monetary engines twirling in your insane, absurd, stupid direction. There are better ways to get blown, thanks!
Related Blog Post:
"Lawn Mowing Lunatics - Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder"
---End of Post "Leaf Blower - insane, absurd, stupid invention..."
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Man versus Machines - gadgets, contraptions
I recently stumbled upon an article on the web, talking about man being a slave to the machines he creates. It's not necessarily the way I would have phrased it, but nonetheless I left a comment. I said, "Technology backfires when it creates a distance between primal human characteristics. Obsession over these mechanical mayhems of society can often lead one astray, as it is our own godly wannabe nature to create things or have it a different way."
My comment on that site, albeit it was spur of the moment, brings up a good point. Technology, in many ways, can create gaps in the true essence of things as it disrupts the fundamentals of nature. There are many gadgets & contraptions geared for laziness, that separates mankind from the dependence of personal labor. When I mention labor, I'm mainly speaking about the experience of getting back something from your works or efforts, earning what you deserve, respecting what you accomplish, etc. - not having machines do it for you. It is sort of like an axe versus a chain saw.
I realize that some people can't use an axe, whether it be due to arthritis or other health issues but if you're able, and I know from experience, you'll take a lot more pride in your work by experiencing it through labor as opposed to automation.
Think about a computer/internet, for example. With all of these "social networks" out there, it has placed many people even further from nature or in better words, it keeps people shut up inside their homes while either pretending to be something else or some super hero in cyberspace or just some junky that is addicted to this glowing contraption that you stare at constantly.
But as far as "Man versus Machines" concepts, it does fall back to our godly wannabe status of creators and seekers of absolute betterment. Unfortunately for man, humans, Homo sapiens or however you want to distinguish yourself (I'm alien with terrestrial misplacement - ha!), the good ol' trait of laziness is what can turn against us. If we do let more gadgets, robots, and machines do most of our work for us, we may eventually lose our roots & elements that once was... and remember, we are all chemically attached to this planet.
On the flip side, the robotic wonders can also be a great advancement in certain aspects. Take medical advancements, for example, that uses high-tech equipment. How can anyone argue about the benefits of that? There are many more pros in favor of technological upgrades, but that is not the point.
It all falls back to what was mentioned earlier, when I said how technology only backfires when it creates a distance between primal human characteristics.
Now, quit staring as this computer and go outside; have some "real" interactions with nature...
---End of Post "Man versus Machines - gadgets, contraptions"
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Weight Loss Poppycock
I'm getting sick and tired of hearing about all of this poppycock featuring weight loss products, procedures, and just plain senseless crap.
There is no need to take this pill here, follow this guide over there, or listen to some supposed "expert" or "market savvy freak" or "numbnut in a white coat" telling you about the fundamentals of losing weight!
Even though this doesn't have anything to do with me, personally, since I don't have the genes to accumulate excessive body mass... BUT it does disgruntle me when I frequently get subjected to it through advertisements, browsing the web (more adverts) or flipping channels (infomercials, etc.) on a television.
Look, dear doltish, dawdling, darlings... If you want to lose weight, quit ingesting massive amounts of calories and maybe try living a less sedentary lifestyle. There are 3,500 calories per pound of body fat; it doesn't get there by itself.
I understand that some people have slow metabolisms, gland trouble, etc., which makes losing weight that much harder. I also understand that, to some, trying to derail yourself from the glut tracks by putting your fork down is as hard as battling drug addictions - due to the constant cravings. I understand this.
What I don't understand, is the need for you to fall for all of these marketing strategies that prey off weak-minded, lethargic idiots that are too lazy to even think for their selves. All the junk, gimmicks, false info and deception out there is, of course, just to make money.
We all know that fruits & vegetables is healthier than lard. Fish is good for you, lean meats are fine, grains aren't bad (you can't blame everything on carbs), and so on. By adding some exercise or simple activity into your sluggish life could always help. Wow! Now that's sound advice!
Okay, outside from basic common sense, what the fuck kind of informative packet do you need? You don't need some complex surgery to shrink your stomach, no miracle pills, no diet plan, no science article, no "expert," no fuckin' nothing! This is simple!
Now, go get some activity in, maybe even workout, have sex, jerk off (with or without the porn), go wander off somewhere in the woods naked, whatever floats your boat... as it doesn't matter as long as you're doing something besides laying around or setting in front of this glowing contraption. And then, try to keep your TOTAL caloric consumption for each day within reasonable limits. Unless you're a diabetic, it's not all about the fucking CARBs (carbohydrates), either. You can't just "cut the Carbs" then go eat 10 pounds of damn bacon that day and be like, "I really did have much sugar or carbs today." Once again, it is the total caloric intake that matters the most. If you are morbidly obese, you need to start out with a severe cut in calories, obviously. Thanks!
Looking for upper body fitness? Check out the Power Tower!
---End of Post "Weight Loss Poppycock"
Sunday, January 17, 2010
The Blogosphere
Intro Post:
Well, here it is again..."the Blogosphere" in full overcast.
I suppose it's not so bad, even though I'm often a hater of glowing contraptions, per se, computers, cell phones, and any other thing that keeps people from enjoying nature and the essence of life.
At any rate, it's winter (at the time I'm writing this) and most people are cramped in their rooms, trying to stay warm...so why not set your thoughts aloft into the blogosphere. Being on the computer when it's 10 degrees Fahrenheit, isn't hindering much outdoor activity.
The reason for the blog's title "Imbecilic Repellent" is simple: I like repelling idiots, morons, and doltish beings. I don't detest ignorance, since we all are to some degree, but I dislike people who spout off about things they know nothing about - you know, the true hardcore dumb asses. Even worse than that, is the infamous "educated idiots."
As for this blog's activity level and goal, hmm..., I don't know. I have so many other things to do, places I go, other blogs I publish on, and random freelance writing tasks on other domains, etc. This will be an occasional pit stop for now; maybe after some content builds and traffic rises, I might put it higher up on the priority list.
For now, I might use it to promote other works or place some nice pics and, if all else fails, it is a nice place for those lovely rants... fun-fun! Okay, now it is time to temporarily depart from the blogosphere...
Image Credit: Free to use & share via Pixabay.com
---End of Post "The Blogosphere"
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